The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord,
that she may be holy both in body and in spirit.
1 Corinthians 7:34
I recently described several reasons why I have chosen not to follow the typical modern-American dating process. However, in giving you that list, I am afraid I left out the most important reason of all. That reason being that the type of lady I wish to marry cannot be found on the dating scene. If she’s looking for me, I’m certainly not looking for her. I have no desire whatsoever to marry a woman who feels that she has to have a man in order for her life to be complete.
A few years ago, I made out a list of things to look for in a future wife. These are all things that I can see from a safe distance without becoming romantically involved, such as whether or not she dresses modestly and how she treats others around her. However, the entire list can be summed up in this: she spends every minute of every day serving God and serving others, seeking every day to know Him better than she did the day before. A woman like that has no time for the dating scene.
You see, the type of woman I’m looking for can’t be found at the singles’ bar or on any of the online dating sites. No. You won’t find her knocking about downtown on a Saturday night, either. Where you will find her is with her family serving up her famous fried chicken and macaroni pie. You’ll find her on the neighbors’ doorstep delivering a freshly baked cake to welcome them to the neighborhood. You’ll find her driving the elderly neighbor lady to the grocery store every Friday morning. You’ll find her weeding her grandmother’s flowerbeds. You’ll find her playing with her nieces and nephews in the backyard. You’ll find her at the church every time the door is open. You’ll find her by her bed on her face before the Lord. That’s where you’ll find the kind of woman I’m looking for.
The Bible tells us that Isaac met Rebecca while she was going about her daily chores watering the camels. The servant that was sent to find her knew that she was the one because she offered to water his camels as well. She had no idea that doing so would land her a husband. Being from the south, I certainly hope that my first encounter with my future-wife will involve some sort of comfort food, but it better not be on the other end of a fish hook. A woman who’s looking won’t find me.
To me, the most attractive thing about any woman is her willingness to serve God and others. When I think of the kind of woman I hope to marry someday, images of Aunt Bea come to mind. You know, that woman who’s always busy but always has room for one more at her dining room table. Truth be told, I don’t date because I don’t have time for a woman who has time to go on a date. I do, however, have time for a woman who’s secretly looking for a battle partner who will join her on her daily mission to reach this world for Christ. Now, that I have time for.